In the Morning:

"My recipe isn't turning out right."
"The microfilm drawers are locked." No they're not.
"Does this town have a museum?"
Small business books.
PRinter advice.
Garbage can?
Garbage can?
Sorry sir, those are reference books and you can't check them out.
Fiction is over there, sir.
Children of trauma, by Jane Middleton-Moz.
Computer workshop schedule.
"My husband says you have books on computers?"
"I need a book by an American writer." Where are these teachers coming from?
How to do an email.
It's my fault when I can't find "memo style" in Word.
Fax to Spain ... which won't go through.
A flurry of people asking for computers or how to do email.
1996 obit.

In the Afternoon:

Reboot.
They want to put up a flyer.
Today's paper.
Lady, turn the damn knob and you'll get to the next page of the paper.
Urban legends.
Dictionaries and Thesauri he can check out.
Yesterday a librarian helped her find a reference book on the Compromise of 1850. "It's green."
BOCA 1996.
Fax.
"You do my taxes?"
Doris Lessing.
Don't run!
Herpes.
Nearby phone book.
Local church phone.
No, the tax people who volunteer downstairs don't charge, sir. I don't care what website you visited.
She forgot her password.
"Gospel books" for an escorted group of mentally challenged.
I am effusively thanked for help I gave last week.
She can't figure out how to sign in to VH1.
Fire trucks, books about Dracula, and later, police cars.

In the Afternoon:

Printer advice.
Printer advice.
Norman Rockwell.
Pencil.
Dreams.
Printer advice.
Criss-cross.
The pigman, by Paul Zindel.
Get a library card at the circ desk, sir.
You could return our book to another library, but I wouldn't recommend it.
Legal seperation.
Books in Italian and Spanish.
"Is there a math tutor in the house."
Spanish grammar.
Printer advice.
A farewell to arms, by Ernest Hemingway.
Yearbooks from the fifties.
"How are you on research?" I nearly cringe.
Treaty at Doona, by Anne McCaffrey and Jody Lynn Nye.
Fun with Acrobat's update mechanism.
A gynocologist's second opinion, by William H. Parker with Rachel L. Parker.
Computer workshop info.
Local physician referral, though it takes him several bad explanations before he can make that clear.

In the Evening:

Two old men with no internet experience.
Info on McDonalds in Asia.
Printer advice.
English grammar tapes.
That's okay, ma'am, we'll reshelve it for you.
The secret epidemic, by Jacob Levenson.
Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
Did we put Rich dad, poor dad on hold for this lady? Did we ILL it? Nobody knows, and we can't find the item.
We're moving to a new internet signup system (with timers) next week, but that's not making anybody happy this week.
The art of war, by Sun Tzu.
Cesar Chavez. I look up the boxer by mistake.
Techie X and I discuss favorite radio sites: WOXY, DFM, and WNUR.
Rosa Bonheur.
Pencil.
Printer advice.
Printer advice.

In the Afternoon:

Stapler.
Law library phone number.
Computer workshop info.
Printer advice.
There's an online catalog right over there, sir.
The two-income trap, by Elizabeth Warren and Amelia Warren Tyagi.
Today's paper.
When is spring break?
Copier advice.
Cold sassy tree, by Olive Anne Burns.
Real estate exam books.
A kid's librarian hands me something to throw away.
Just press enter, ma'am.

In the Evening:

Every public computer develops its own unique problem at once.
Biographical sketches of Condoleezza Rice, Colin Powell, and Jesse Jackson.
Sorry, ma'am, your daughter is too young to use the internet terminals up here.
"My computer's broke." Sigh.
Copier advice.
"The printer won't ... er ..."
Dandelion wine, by Ray Bradbury.
Printer advice.
3-hole punch.
"My computer is saying it'd like to do an illegal operation."
Printer advice.
Printer advice.
"Mumble-mumble-mumble-pen?"
My bloody life, and Once a king, always a king, by Reymundo Sanchez.
Newspapers last week, for an obit.
U.S. road atlas.
"Can you hold this for me while I'm in the bathroom?"
This patron is going to keep asking us for tax advice until we wear down.
More newspapers.
"Something is wrong with that computer."
Printer advice.
Sorry sir, they don't let me renew ILLs.
They'll sell you a floppy at the front desk, sir.
"Can you hold this for me again?"
Copier advice.

In the Afternoon:

The doors open. God, it's like a swarm.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
Ida B. Wells.
Area parks.
Local history books.
Why is her brother in jail, and why did another guy have his green card "deported?"
Saturday's paper.
Printer advice.
Weekend paper.
"How do I look for jobs on the internet?"
Runaway jury on DVD.
Today's paper.
The only available Zane book is the one she doesn't want. We do better with Omar Tyree.
Books by Queen Afua.
Play piano in a flash, by Scott Houston.
Nah, your computer isn't frozen, sir.
Snakes, at least that's what he claims to want when I spot him lounging in the stacks with his buddy, pulling out books at random.
Plants, so his buddy claims.
Monet.
Wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw, says the boy, over and over and over. I finally go over and tell him to shut up. "My sister was about to throw bread."
He doesn't ask. He just takes the stapler.
Dona nobis pacem, by Ralph Vaughan Williams.
Today's paper.
"What are your hours today?"
Google is one of many search engines, sir. You don't have to use it.
1040 EZ
Typewriter? Sorry, not here.
Chicken soup for the teenage soul II, and those Pelzer books.
Is "Imparse" a word (though she doesn't know the actual spelling, let alone the meaning)?
Printer advice.

In the Afternoon:

A film called "The good, the bad, and the evil," which I cannot locate in my five minute window of opportunity.
Accounting books.
No cell phones, ma'am.
Shut up, kids.
I warned you. Get off the machines (I am then thanked by another user).
Tax counseling info.
Do you want to use the program Microsoft Word, or do you want books on it, or what, ma'am?
Sorry ma'am, no one has signed up for the workshop you're conducting yet.
I chat with a patron about broadband while he waits for a fax to go through.
How much money will it cost him to print a 42-page document?
A two year-old book with a New Book sticker.
Pencil and paper.

In the Morning:

County jobs.
The internet terminals are all full. Don't blame me, ma'am.
My comuter is making a chugging noise.
Printer advice.
State tax form.
Fax.
They'll stamp that at circ, sir.
I proctor.
"Can I print out my bill on these computers?"
Incorporation data for a nearby town.
Yesterday's paper.
Printer advice.
When I say no, I feel guilty, by Manuel J. Smith, Mirror, mask, and shadow, by Sheldon B. Kopp, and Children of trauma, ed. Thomas W. Miller.
Pregnancy books.
Press enter, sir.
Printer advice.
Two notarizations.
Books on fixing credit. We're out.
Medical books. That's all he'll say.
That's not an internet terminal, sir. That's a card catalog.
Two more notarizations. Some documents don't really need it, but it looks official, and it's free.
Bus schedules.
1985 Toyota Corolla repair manual.

In the Afternoon:

The second ref computer is being fixed, so I stand around wondering what to do.
Printer reset.
Computer workshop schedule.
"Anyone getting off the computer?" she shouts.
Books on car crashes.
Want ads.
Books by Maya Angelou.
Don't yell.
Reboot.
Computers with Word are over there, ma'am.
Indiana travel.
Techie X returns with the second computer. All my bookmarks are gone.
State tax forms.
Books of questions.
"African tribal culture." Where do we get these teachers?
Today's paper.
Another internet policy complaint. I love it when they sigh.
You don't need a debit card if you have a library card, kid.