In the Evening

Napoleon Dynamite.
Constantine.
Online GED classes.
Two volumes of Ingles sin barreras.
"Cold enough for you?"
Printer advice.
Copier advice.
Dictionary.
They'll break a ten over there, sir.
You renew cards over there, ma'am.
Printer advice.
Was that a duck I just heard?
The machine ate her dollar, she says, though it's working for me and everyone else.
Come to think of it, it is kind of cold in here tonight ...
Tae bo, and ESL materials.
Auto mechanic career info.
I hear the duck again.
Chaplin on DVD.

In the Morning:

Tissue.
He wants to get his credit report online, when he's never used a computer and can't read or write to boot.
Effectiveness of torture (no relation to the previous patron).
Two guys are here to fix the public printer.
Wilson databases and a runaround.
That man snorts every ten seconds.
First aid for the USMLE Step 1.
Keep it down, please.
I refill a tape dispenser.
Sorry, ma'am, I don't speak Spanish.
Yearbooks 1974-75.
Christ the Lord, by Anne Rice.
Just type in your barcode, sir.
It's awfully early for Librarian Y to start looking at cookbooks.
Wilfrid Brown and some other opera singer.
The microfilm is over there, ma'am.
Pen.
No cellphones, ma'am.
They're still working on the printer. They leave, they come back with another box.
The joy of signing, by Lottie L. Riekehof.
Keep it down, guys.
Cook books, especially desserts.
We print out a powerpoint thing for a patron.
Dictionary, or a map.
Email books.

In the Afternoon:

The printer repair guys are still here. Heart surgery takes less time.

Yesterday

An old man in a Cubs jacket and cap: "I'm so sick of hearing about the White Sox."

In the Morning:

I come in late.
The girls in their summer dresses, by Irwin Shaw.
Polkas from Slovenia.
A fax goes through after the fourth try.
The computer class is at one, ma'am.
Appointment in Samarra, by John O'hara.
The circ staff argues over who gets lunch.
Copier advice.
Sorry ma'am, you need a card to use the internet machines.
His first resume. I show him the books. Later, the templates.
Washrooms are over there, sir.

In the Afternoon:

A rumor of war, by Philip Caputo, and The longest day.
The second battle of Bull Run.
Two straight patrons with "The computer won't take my card" issues.
Copier advice.
Gee boss I don't know where that book is. Or that one.
Stapler.
"Is Librarian Q there?"
The harmonies for "Leaving on a jet plane."
Major Dundee, and Geronimo.
Microfilm reader advice.
Fax.
Where the hell did all the other librarians go?
Bonsai videos.
Lovesick blues, by Paul Hemphill.
Rhinoceros, by Eugene Ionesco.
I boast about my ability to remove stuck floppies, then I fail.
Try typing your name with the apostrophe, ma'am.
Librarians Y and K are discussing sandwiches. And pate.
"My card doesn't work on the computer."

The Other Day:

"Did my book get returned? I told the guy to bring the book in yesterday. I even gave him five bucks. If he hasn't returned it I'm gonna kill him."

In the Afternoon:

1965 Chevrolet Impala repair manual.
Article from National Geographic.
CDs are a dollar to rent, sir.
A live coal in the sea, by Madeleine L'Engle.
Math in the kitchen, and how to read scales.
Portland International Airport phone numbers.
Librarian Y sneaks off the desk while muttering something.
He doesn't know if he wants Stitch! The movie or Lilo and Stitch one or two or if there's any relation between them, and besides, he has them all anyway ...
Fax.
"Is (another librarian) there?"
Let me explain this copier to you, ma'am.
Librarian Y returns holding a sinister looking bunch of cables.
"Do your computers have sound?"
"You got a class on CD burners?"
I explain the concept of cut and paste.
A couple atlases.
Printer advice.
A big argument about whether the White Sox have clinched or not.
I have to write out the directions to cut and paste. She goes on and on about turkey recipes.
"I'm a computer moron," she says, and waits for me to laugh.
Books on what attracts people to people.
No cell phones, ma'am.
Books on job interviews.
"I printed. Where's the paper?"
Writer's market.
James Herriot books in large print.
Children's books? Downstairs.
Baseball books.
Printer advice.
Stapler.
They'll renew your card over there (twice).
I have no Spanish. He had no English. He keeps pointing to his card and himself and shaking his head.
Sorry, kid. Our ruler has vanished.
Just type in your barcode, ma'am.
Printer advice.
They'll make change over there, sir.
Will we proctor a test for him?
Fax.
Computer class signup.
Please just sit down at a machine and type in your barcode, sir.

One more day until my vacation ...