In the Morning:

Printer advice.
YMCA phone number.
A patron can't believe that we don't have city directories for his town and complains about our lack of service.
Bathroom.
Tape.
A man on his way to the internet terminals mutters something about downloading a coupon for a pack of Salems.
Music Publishing, by Tim Whitsett, and How to make money scoring soundtracks and jingles, by Jeffrey P. Fisher.
Fax machine?
Pencil.

In the Afternoon:

"What age group is Romeo and Juliet written for?"
A lame old TV show joke comes to life: A rather obnoxious woman wants to start an etiquette school.
A lady wants to find someone in Pocono, Florida, which doesn't exist. Before I could continue with the interview, she got cut off.
A guy tries to print out a web page only to have three different terminals crash on him.
Fax machine.
2002 issues of Guitar Player.
Librarian Y thinks a book cart looks "lonely."
Stapler. The patron tells me that I am a nice person.
Always true to you in my fashion, by Valerie Wilson Wesley.
4:30 PM, and Librarian Y and I have begun to discuss food.
Sorry ma'am, I can't go around looking for a man with a chipped tooth.
A patron knows a lot about movie history and fills Techie Y and me in on John Wayne and the Three Stooges.
Librarian Y and I have an argument about peaches and melons.
Fax machine?

Internet Signups: 47

In the Afternoon:

The dearly departed, by Elinor Lipman.
Printer advice.
Don't hang from the counter, kid. The top will flip over and bonk you on the head (Kids seem to enjoy this explanation).
... So the kid goes off to run in the stacks.
... Followed by her little sister.
Printer advice.
In the company of heroes, by Michael J. Durant.
Restroom.
Try a different terminal, ma'am.
Local surgical supply company.
A patron calls me "dear."
Websurfing advice.
You're too young to use our internet terminal.
Books about Dolly Parton.
Two weeks of papers.
A man picks up a form he had left in the copier.
Another patron wants to give us notaries extra legal powers.

In the Evening:

"Where is Plainfield?"
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's stone, by J. k. Rowling, on tape.
A patron writes down the ISBN number rather than the call number.
The little Sas book, by Susan J. Slaughter.
A pointless discussion involving library cards and out of state drivers licences.
Printer advice.
I have a hard time locating a doctor's phone number because I had spelled his name wrong.
Jack the Ripper books. The patron was embarrassed. He was also embarrassed asking for Anne Rice books.
Local history books.

Interlude

I cover for Librarian Y and teach a computer workshop, but no one showed up.

Back to the Desk

An 8 year old girl in the stacks knows I'm looking at her, so she does her best "run while pretending not to run." Sort of an awkward, jerky jog.
Printer advice.
The girl gives in to evil and runs. Don't run!
Graduate school admission essay guidebooks.
A woman wants to find "Jesus Gear" online.
Another lady can't get enough of our benind-the-counter wicca books.
Printer advice.
GED practice tests online.
Spider bite pictures.
Printer advice.
A woman doesn't understand why, when she looks at an email attachment, that it didn't have the changes she just two hours making. She was not happy.

Internet Signups: 42

In the Morning:

Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Department of Immigration civil service exams.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup. I went to library school for this?
Computer crash.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Can I help you? "No, appreciate it."
Internet signup.
They need you to type in your birthdate another way, ma'am.
Printer advice, actually a printer controversy.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
I break up a congregation at an internet terminal. They take it badly.
I fix a copier jam and my hands are covered in toner.
Today's papers.
Printer advice.
Internet signup.
Printer advice.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Resume books.
Hotmail advice.
IE freezes.
Computer crash.
It prints at this machine over here, sir.
More Hotmail advice.
Printer advice.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
They guy wrestling with Hotmail gives up for now.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
I had two actual reference questions all morning.

In the Afternoon:

Hospital phone number.
Internet signup.
She wants a "matricula card."
She left her phone charger in the library. When she called to ask about it her phone died.
The Crucible, by Arthur Miller. All ten copies are gone.
I talk to a man with the loudest walkman in the world.
Yes, I'm a notary, ma'am, but I can't tell you how to word your document.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Today's paper.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Today's paper is out, sir.
Miltary supply store in another town.
Techie X grabs our pair of scissors and heads out towards the internet users.
Telephone wiring.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Notarization.
Computer workshop question.
A patron will pay for speedy research, but we just don't have the manpower.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Internet signup.
Books on choosing a manager, or agent. I don't think he knew.

In the Morning:

Don't bang on the computer keys, kid.
Here's a computer workshop schedule, ma'am.
"How long can you have a Yahoo account until they charge you?"
Computer crash.
Computer crash.
Johnny Angel, by Danielle Steel, Kate remembered, by A. Scott Berg, and Gone too far, by Suzanne Brockman.
Librarian Q gets: "I'm looking for frogs, in color."
A man lost his bike helmet. He's been in the library five minutes ... Whoops! He found it.
Printer advice.
Internet advice.
Study room.
Microfilm problem.
Today's paper.
"Can I burn a CD here?" Sorry.
"My computer slows down after I use it awhile ..." Another question that should go to a tech support guy.
Basic beginner computer books.
Old dictionaries.
Printer advice.
Tecumseh motor repair manual.
"You put the copy in the machine and push the button, right?"
A woman believes our study room has whiteboards in them. White walls, yes, but not whiteboards.
Bus driving exams.

On my way to lunch a car slows down. The driver is a regular patron who wants to ask me a reference question.

In the Afternoon:

"Can I use the computer?" No, you're too small. "I TOLD you," says a second kid.
ESL materials.
Stapler.
Printer advice.
Outrageous misconduct, by Paul Brodeur.
Woman with two infant children asks Librarian Q for books on fertility.
Local Comcast phone number.
Why do people waiting at the desk assume I want to chat with them while I'm helping another patron?
Printer advice.
A man just doesn't understand why we don't permit church services in our meeting room.
Whiteout.
Today's paper.
Test book practice guides for a test I've never heard of.
Librarian Q gets: "Do you get interpersonal library loans?" He wanted the song Optimistic, by Sounds of Blackness.
Today's paper.
I show Mr. Interpersonal an All-music guide and he goes crazy choosing albums he wants to interpersonal loan. I am a little ashamed to say I was relieved that Librarian Q had to do the dirty work.
The August Woman's Day has vanished.
Investors business daily for last week
She wants to find a street in a nearby town, but we fail.
A patron disapproves of our stapler.
How to organize a fashion show.
Printer advice.
Here's a catalog terminal here, sir.
Librarian Y kicks me off the desk.

Internet signups: 36