In the Morning:

Broken dollar bill changer.
Healthcare infomatics.
Microfilm reader lecture.
Dispatches, by Michael Herr.
Bruce Lee books.
The newspaper microfilm is self serve, but some patrons insist I do it for them.
Wolves of the Calla, by Stephen King, on tape.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
Auto body painting.
Printer advice.
Printer advice.
Printer advice.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
Two annoying cell phone ringers at once.
Envelopes?
Directions to a mall.
Our city's street numbering system.
Our hours tomorrow.
Today's paper.
Microfilm reader lecture.
"I'm computer illiterate ..."
Books by Jack London, "or any book by an American writer."
We have some tax forms, ma'am, but not all of them.
I tell him over and over again that I can't look up his patron record or tell if his barcode's expired. He stands there holding out the card at me.
Bulldozer repair.
Don't run!

In the Afternoon:

They'll sell you a disk at the front desk, ma'am.
He got a replacement card and wonders why the money balance on it wasn't carried forward on the new card. Some people are cheap.
Copier advice.
Foreign Services Officer exams.
An email attachment won't open.
"My computer froze."
Sorry, sir, you can't access that database from home without a library card.
Bloom's notes for Dickens.
1977 phone book. A prop for a play.
The secret epidemic, by Jacob Levenson. I thought I had already ILL'd this book for this patron. To make sure, for the first time, I used my own blog as a reference source.
Copier advice.
Another patron shocked by our printer policy.
His Word toolbars have vanished. He wants them back.
The perfect wife, by Ann Gerhart.
Printer advice.
Who keeps transferring circ goofups to me?
Napoleon.
The inevitable big problem with his Word document five minutes before closing.
Celia Cruz books.

In the Morning:

The omega-3 connection, by Andrew L. Stoll.
No ma'am, switching from '98 to XP isn't that hard.
Reboot.
Book discussion group info.
Where to find Air America locally.
Printer advice.
Obits from way back.
How to get a debit card here.
Info on an old vocational school that used to be downtown.
Fax.
Nearby library's phone.
Sharpening made easy, by Paul Bottorff.
Some child custody form 2-1401. "They said the library has it."

In the Afternoon:

Today's paper.
Naughty or nice, by Eric Jerome Dickey.
She doesn't have time to download her tax form.
Books on Word.
Another tax form.
Yesterday's paper.
Yesterday's Wall Street journal.
Roman Italy, by T. W. Potter, and Romans on the Bay of Naples, by John H. D'Arms.
1993 Chevrolet Cube Van repair manual.
He left all his tax stuff with the tax counselors, and now they're gone.
Stapler.
That's not an internet terminal, sir. That's a card catalog.
Another old man at a loss with the internet and expecting an instant class.
More impatience with our obviously incompentent internet policy.
Copier advice.
There's an online catalog you can use, sir.
I go to a pointless, depressing meeting. I come back.
Copier advice.
The zone, by Barry Sears.
Press enter, sir.
The kids section is downstairs, sir.
Stamp price guides.
Louis Armstrong.
1040X
Computer workshop schedule.
"Stong black novels, like Martin Luther King. You know: war. African-Americans. Race. War books ..." This is an adult speaking.

In the Morning:

"My recipe isn't turning out right."
"The microfilm drawers are locked." No they're not.
"Does this town have a museum?"
Small business books.
PRinter advice.
Garbage can?
Garbage can?
Sorry sir, those are reference books and you can't check them out.
Fiction is over there, sir.
Children of trauma, by Jane Middleton-Moz.
Computer workshop schedule.
"My husband says you have books on computers?"
"I need a book by an American writer." Where are these teachers coming from?
How to do an email.
It's my fault when I can't find "memo style" in Word.
Fax to Spain ... which won't go through.
A flurry of people asking for computers or how to do email.
1996 obit.

In the Afternoon:

Reboot.
They want to put up a flyer.
Today's paper.
Lady, turn the damn knob and you'll get to the next page of the paper.
Urban legends.
Dictionaries and Thesauri he can check out.
Yesterday a librarian helped her find a reference book on the Compromise of 1850. "It's green."
BOCA 1996.
Fax.
"You do my taxes?"
Doris Lessing.
Don't run!
Herpes.
Nearby phone book.
Local church phone.
No, the tax people who volunteer downstairs don't charge, sir. I don't care what website you visited.
She forgot her password.
"Gospel books" for an escorted group of mentally challenged.
I am effusively thanked for help I gave last week.
She can't figure out how to sign in to VH1.
Fire trucks, books about Dracula, and later, police cars.

In the Afternoon:

Printer advice.
Printer advice.
Norman Rockwell.
Pencil.
Dreams.
Printer advice.
Criss-cross.
The pigman, by Paul Zindel.
Get a library card at the circ desk, sir.
You could return our book to another library, but I wouldn't recommend it.
Legal seperation.
Books in Italian and Spanish.
"Is there a math tutor in the house."
Spanish grammar.
Printer advice.
A farewell to arms, by Ernest Hemingway.
Yearbooks from the fifties.
"How are you on research?" I nearly cringe.
Treaty at Doona, by Anne McCaffrey and Jody Lynn Nye.
Fun with Acrobat's update mechanism.
A gynocologist's second opinion, by William H. Parker with Rachel L. Parker.
Computer workshop info.
Local physician referral, though it takes him several bad explanations before he can make that clear.

In the Evening:

Two old men with no internet experience.
Info on McDonalds in Asia.
Printer advice.
English grammar tapes.
That's okay, ma'am, we'll reshelve it for you.
The secret epidemic, by Jacob Levenson.
Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
Did we put Rich dad, poor dad on hold for this lady? Did we ILL it? Nobody knows, and we can't find the item.
We're moving to a new internet signup system (with timers) next week, but that's not making anybody happy this week.
The art of war, by Sun Tzu.
Cesar Chavez. I look up the boxer by mistake.
Techie X and I discuss favorite radio sites: WOXY, DFM, and WNUR.
Rosa Bonheur.
Pencil.
Printer advice.
Printer advice.

In the Afternoon:

Stapler.
Law library phone number.
Computer workshop info.
Printer advice.
There's an online catalog right over there, sir.
The two-income trap, by Elizabeth Warren and Amelia Warren Tyagi.
Today's paper.
When is spring break?
Copier advice.
Cold sassy tree, by Olive Anne Burns.
Real estate exam books.
A kid's librarian hands me something to throw away.
Just press enter, ma'am.

In the Evening:

Every public computer develops its own unique problem at once.
Biographical sketches of Condoleezza Rice, Colin Powell, and Jesse Jackson.
Sorry, ma'am, your daughter is too young to use the internet terminals up here.
"My computer's broke." Sigh.
Copier advice.
"The printer won't ... er ..."
Dandelion wine, by Ray Bradbury.
Printer advice.
3-hole punch.
"My computer is saying it'd like to do an illegal operation."
Printer advice.
Printer advice.
"Mumble-mumble-mumble-pen?"
My bloody life, and Once a king, always a king, by Reymundo Sanchez.
Newspapers last week, for an obit.
U.S. road atlas.
"Can you hold this for me while I'm in the bathroom?"
This patron is going to keep asking us for tax advice until we wear down.
More newspapers.
"Something is wrong with that computer."
Printer advice.
Sorry sir, they don't let me renew ILLs.
They'll sell you a floppy at the front desk, sir.
"Can you hold this for me again?"
Copier advice.

In the Afternoon:

The doors open. God, it's like a swarm.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
Ida B. Wells.
Area parks.
Local history books.
Why is her brother in jail, and why did another guy have his green card "deported?"
Saturday's paper.
Printer advice.
Weekend paper.
"How do I look for jobs on the internet?"
Runaway jury on DVD.
Today's paper.
The only available Zane book is the one she doesn't want. We do better with Omar Tyree.
Books by Queen Afua.
Play piano in a flash, by Scott Houston.
Nah, your computer isn't frozen, sir.
Snakes, at least that's what he claims to want when I spot him lounging in the stacks with his buddy, pulling out books at random.
Plants, so his buddy claims.
Monet.
Wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw-wuaw, says the boy, over and over and over. I finally go over and tell him to shut up. "My sister was about to throw bread."
He doesn't ask. He just takes the stapler.
Dona nobis pacem, by Ralph Vaughan Williams.
Today's paper.
"What are your hours today?"
Google is one of many search engines, sir. You don't have to use it.
1040 EZ
Typewriter? Sorry, not here.
Chicken soup for the teenage soul II, and those Pelzer books.
Is "Imparse" a word (though she doesn't know the actual spelling, let alone the meaning)?
Printer advice.