In the Morning:

Yesterday's paper.
Directions to a high school.
Stapler.
Librarian Z gets a request for the "national recorder of deeds" and a conspiracy lecture.
Keep it down, guys.
She insists it's "Maxwell Parrish." She is utterly certain.
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, by J. K. Rowling.
The last juror, by John Grisham, The cat who talked turkey, and Third degree, by James Patterson.
Books by Robert Kiyosaki.
Pencil.
A flurry of voter registrations. "I don't normally vote, but this guy we got in there now ..."
You have to be high school age to use the internet.
Pencil.
"What do I click on for the internet?"
Today's paper.
Tax counseling hours.
The South Beach diet, by Arthur Agatston
The 7 habits of highly effective teens, by Sean Covey.
The Hallo-wiener, by Dav Pilkey.
Today's paper.
Today's paper.
Books by The barefoot contessa.
I'm sorry ma'am, you were transferred to the wrong desk (she was later transferred to me again).
"When do you close?"
Algebra books.
A patron gives me really stupid advice on finding a book.
Something about a popcorn factory.
Thursday's paper. ... He can't find the article. How about Wednesday's? ... Fridays?

In the Afternoon:

Reboot.
Books about Mary Hoffman and learning piano.
Reboot, then she doesn't want the computer after all.
Caligula.
I wish this patron would buy her used car already. She's constantly calling us for blue book prices.
Printer advice.
A Bill Gates fan club? I didn't know there was such a thing.
Computer workshop info in spanish.
Another innocent floppy brings down several of our computers.
The spelling of "correspondence."
He lost his wallet.
The spelling of "Ethiopia."
How come it's always our fault when their email message won't go through?
Bringing down the house, by Ben Mezrich.
Her brand new disc won't cooporate.
Old tax forms.
Printer advice.
Pencil.
Yep, "Missing" mean's it's gone, ma'am.
SAT books.
Printer advice.
Printer advice (Press where it says "Press here," ma'am).
To build a fire, by Jack London.
Pencil.
Pencil.
Reboot.
From the sound of it that kid is dying of consumption.

Tax Forms are Over There: 3

In the Morning:

There's a pay phone in the lobby, ma'am, where's it's really cold.
Books on goalsetting for middleschoolers.
My brilliant reference interview concludes with me saying "This one's got some stuff and this one's got other stuff."
FAFSA forms.
Nostradamus books.
Info on our adult literacy programs.
Info on our spanish language programs.
Classifieds.
State tax forms.
"Romance-mysteries?"
Notarization.
Deader by the lake, by Doug M. Cummings.
1099 forms.
"Can I check out five books?"
Copier advice.
Collectors' Information Bureau's collectibles market guide & price index, and Hyman's Trash or treasure guide to buyers, by Tony Hyman.
Space Shuttle, by Dennis R. Jenkins.
ILL forms.

In the Afternoon:

Librarian Y wonders about her w2 forms.
Rosa Parks.
Once a king, always a king, but he'll take any Remundo Sanchez books.
Naughty or nice, by Eric Jerome Dickey.
Her computer just ... died.
There's no LaSalle Street. in this town, in spite of his assurances.
The local unemployment office has moved. Bastards.
Printer advice, part one (Sending it to the server).
What about fish skins? "Everything about 'em."
Lies and the lying liars who tell them, by Al Franken, and Bushwhacked, by Molly Ivins.
Charles Givens books.
The vampire book, by J. Gordon Melton.
She needs that Rosa Parks book again.
Zip code.
"Poems." You need to narrow it down. "What would you recommend?"
Hawaii, the government, and "why it's special."
Computer workshop schedule.
How to draw cartoons.
Sunday's paper.
Flyy girl, by Omar Tyree.
Supervision of police personnel, by Nathan F. Iannone and Marvin D. Iannone, and Criminal investigation, by Charles R. Swanson, Neil C. Chamelin and Leonard Territo.
Company address.
I think someone told someone that we own Kelley books now. We're getting more calls.
Financial aid books.
"Where are the adult nonfiction?"
BMX bikes.
Pencil.
Chaucer.
Poe.
"Do you speak spanish?" No. "Do you speak spanish?"
Emily Dickinson
Careers in graphic design, computer animation, that sort of thing.
ESL books.
I curse at my computer a little too loudly.

No Signup: 4

In the Morning:

"Is that the courthouse over there?"
GED books.
Dictionary.
"When does the paper come out I didn't jump at you you jumped at me when does the paper come out I'm not a computer illiterate ..." One of our regulars.
Two crashes.
Today's paper.
Another crash.
My word it's slow today.
Dental Hygienest info online.

No Signup: 2

In the Afternoon:

Divorce law.
Five ILL forms.
Online person search.
Copier advice.
Addicted, by Zane, and Men cry in the dark, by Michael Baisden.
I don't know what immigration form you want, sir.
"I need help with my email."
Librarian X can't come in, so I'm working this evening!
Donald Goines books.
I leave early to teach a workshop.

In the Evening:

Blood and gold, by Anne Rice. Hard to find because the patron asks for "The story of Marius."
Techie X and I talk about the Teen Titans.
Spanish grammar books.
Computer workshop schedule.
The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexandre Dumas, but she hangs up before I can retrieve it.
You too can find anybody, by Joseph J. Culligan.
Don't run!
Local jobs online?
Two twelve year-old girls: "It doesn't matter. I have ketchup." "No, I have ketchup." Is there something going on in the world I don't know about?
Don't run!
Sing, sing, sing, but she wants the sheet music.
Stuff on Clarence Darrow, particularly Leopold and Loeb.
African dance videos.
Matthew Lesko and grant writing books.
Computer workshop schedule.

No Signup: 2 (Getting there)

In the Evening:

Our terminals are packed. There's people waiting, and the whining gets louder every day.
1992 Volvo price.
"You should have a way to get them off the computer so we can get on." He does not define "they" and "we."
Anna Sewell.
Beverly Clearly.
Printer advice.
Three pencils.
Computer workshop info in spanish.
Stapler.
"Do you have any books with stories about fornication?"
Another Internet policy complaint.
They'll sell you a floppy at the front desk, sir.
She just moved to town and lives in a group home. May she have a library card?
A man stands in front of Librarian W and talks about the internet for ten minutes, tossing out lines like: "Where's the concept of satisfaction?"
Algebra books.
Mathematics for the trades, by Robert A. Carman and Hal M. Saunders.
The definition of "thesis."
WPs are over there, sir, well, there are some over there, too.
Meeting room signup question.
I've never done electronic filing, so I can't tell you, sir.
Criss-cross.
"Are the computers always this busy?"
Tax forms are over there, sir.
You can buy a debit card over there, ma'am.
Printer advice. The kids are dubious.
Last minute printer advice.

No Signup: 7