In the Morning:

Printer advice.
The AV room is downstairs, ma'am.
1992 Mazda 929 repair manual.
"Has so-and-so signed up for the computer?" Sorry, ma'am, I can't give out that information. "Fuck you." (Click)
We put your notebook in the lost and found, sir.
Why is this man telling me about The weakest link?
"The history of a jacket."
Harry Potter and the prisoner of Azkaban, on tape.
Does Mapquest do Mexico?
Printer advice.
Printer advice.
Two notarizations.
I don't think he cares which anti-Bush book he gets, just so he gets one.
ASVAB book.
APA style manual.

In the Afternoon:

A lousy, stinking salesman.
There's another copier downstairs, sir.
Newspapers.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
Some Ultimate X-men volumes.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
Printer advice.
Sorry, sir, no food in the library.
African Laughter, by Doris Lessing, and The lion on the path, by Hugh Tracey.
"Is so-and-so there?" Sorry, ma'am, I can't give out that information. "Oh that's okay. Thank you!" (Click)
The bean trees, by Barbara Kingsolver.
A raisin in the sun, by Lorraine Hansberry.
"I want to know if you got this book." What book? "I just forgot ..."

Internet Signups: 20

In the Morning:

"Do you speak spanish?"
Automobile body work.
She can't figure out an online college catalog. ... Neither can I.
Copier advice.
Driving directions, in great detail.
Librarian Y and I discuss the weather.
Can I help you? "No."
Librarian Y and I discuss digital cameras.
Printer advice.
Printer advice.
Computer crash.
Today's papers.
Computer crash.
Printer advice.
Librarian Y and I discuss Lene Lovich.
"Is Bob there?" Bob?
Today's paper.
The republic, by Plato.
Computer workshop info.

In the Afternoon:

The lovely bones, by Alice Sebold.
Local zoning ordinances.
"Medical billing."
Notarization.
Computer crash.
Scram, kid.
It's 3:20, sir.
Of mice and men, by John Steinbeck.
"The resolution on my screen just went, like, totally huge."
Love poetry.
Jacobean age.
Pencil and paper, and don't call me buddy.
Skin care and nutrition.
Pimples? Yes, sir. Oh, you said pit bulls. Sorry.
Computer crash.
Computer crash.
Off these machines, kids.
Edgar Allan Poe.
Yearbooks.
Copier advice.
More pit bulls.
Pen.
They'll make change at the front desk, kid.
Copier advice.
Police academies.
We find his missing floppy. "My whole life is on this disk." I suggest he make a backup.
WPs are over there, sir.
That's all the scratch paper we have, kid, and don't run!
Home remodeling.
Home appliance repair.
Wells? You mean the things to draw water out of? Oh, whales. Sorry.

Internet Signups: 39

In the Morning:

No, sir, don't worry, you logged in correctly.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
He lost his pager.
Printer advice.
WPs are over there, ma'am.
Printer advice.
Printer advice.
Sorry, sir, no fax.
"Do you have any networking jobs open here?"
Local bus schedule.
The Peloponnesian war, by Thucydides.
Microfilm machine advice.
Resume books.
"You got computers for the kids to play on?"
Printer advice.
I wish I knew where that missing reel was myself, sir.
CNA test.
Pencil sharpener.
I hate it when would-be techies try to give us advice about our network.
Winesburg, Ohio by Sherwood Anderson.
Local bus map.
Computer passwords not working.
A floppy crashes four computers, including mine.
"How much will it cost to translate this from spanish to english?"

Internet Signups: 43

In the Afternoon:

"Greek mythology ... They had people with wings, right?"
Missing wallet.
A lot of city directories.
Missing volumes of Transmetropolitan. I'm pissed off about it too.
How to write short stories.
Tattoo books.
Sorry, sir, no one at the parole office told us anything about a court order to keep your stepson from looking at vodou sites on the web.
Gossip girl books, and The A-list, by Zoey Dean.
Copier advice.
Coin and paper money collecting.
Sorry, you have to be older than nine to use the computer, little girl.
Missing floppy.
Houseplants.
Copier advice. I hate the new copier.
Alcorn State transcripts.
Government job websites.
Microfilm machine advice.
"Jewish cookbooks."
Poetry.
Medical dictionary.
Rubber band, or tape.
Sorry, you have to be more than eleven to use the computers up here, little girl.
Renew your card at the front desk, sir.
Or bi-yearly request for a TTY phone.
Don't run!
"Teen poetry."
The big bad wolf, by James Patterson.

Internet Signups: 11

In the Afternoon:

Why do some people ask permission before taking scratch paper from the tray?
War poetry.
La vida loca, by Luis Rodriguez.
Local congressman's phone.
Librarian Q is helping a patron who doesn't want me to hear him, but I hear the words "incarcerated," and "statutes."
Today's paper.
CDL training books.
A directory to all the advertisers in the country.
He wants an anatomy book, "newer than Gray's."
Diabetes.
The almighty latin king and queen nation, by David C. Brotherton and Luis Barrios.
Stapler.

In the Evening:

Print server crash.
Are we open tomorrow?
How to load the microfilm reader.
"Books on the culture of England in the 20th century."
Master and commander, by Patrick O'Brien.
HTML books.
The Renaissance.
Pencil sharpener.
Out of the stacks, kids.
Phone for Comcast.
"How do you double-space?"
Printer advice.
A book, placed on hold, wasn't there.
Copier advice.
Bathroom?
My bloody life, by Reymundo Sanchez.
The Louisiana purchase.
Another document erased because a patron got too cute with Word and didn't save.
Godspell vocal score, which someone had promised was on the shelf. It was not.

Internet Signups: 14